CLIOGODDESS

I just woke up from a quick slumber when i saw ivy opening a white plastic wrapper and i swear i saw a little girl's face beam  like when you cought a child trying to hide what she's doing. She tried to offer me that odd looking chocolate covered cake but since i seldom eat sweets i declined.

She told me it's called HO HO's and it came from the united states. She considers it as her number one guilty pleasure eversince she had a taste of it as a littlle girl. She and her sister still fight over a box untill now and both are grown up women with their own families. (talk about indulgence)

She even confided that she really didnt want to offer me but out of "BEING NICE" she tried too. Now i wonder what could have she felt if indeed i took a bite, hahaha would she cry??? I should have taken a bite to find out. hahahah

So give me some love and send me some hostess

When i heard this song, I instantly fell in love with it but nobody seemed to know who sang it or what is the titlle of the song. Thanks Heavens for rachel who happens to be a walking IPOD.

This was made by seisui from youtube. (THANKS)

Just like the instant liking for the song. I kinda felt the same way for this web developer guy that i met. i hope he felt the same way for me too!

My friend rachel recently inaugurated her 2nd blog. This is her second blog since she cant remember where in hell did she put her 1st blog, neither could she remember the name of that blog so might as well start a new one. She called its katha-inyo-senseo. (catchy aint it? NOT!) she cant even remember this when i ask her about address of her blog. Anyway  I consider her one of the talented agents that i've met, Southern, black, standard, australian, english accents, Ruffa mae quinto accent. A little bit of chinese dialect and korean language are some of her specialty. An anorexic gluton (hehehe kidding) She is just blessed to have an appetite of a sumo wrestler and the metabolic rate of a hummingbird. Here she is doing what she does best. Browse over magazine pages for the newest fashion and little celeb gossips.

Then she found my new pictorial for FHM MAGAZINE.

After the shock, she decided to surf over the web and of course nothing's there but paris hilton, CLIO GODDESS and the transformer trailer.

 W/C is really boring since paris is so overrated and the rumors about me are so not true and the transformer trailer gets annoying after seeing it over 25 thousand times. So what can an employee do to develop skills and better her performance?

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Hey! we need to put all the things we learn in our long term memory and we can only do that through DEEP SLEEP

RACHEL YU's BLOG >>>>>katha-inyo-senseo<<<<<< CLICK

I was rummaging through my stuff and i stumbled upon a piece of paper i acutely remember. It was the piece of paper where i wrote the lyrics of PART OF YOUR WORLD from the disney movie the little mermaid. I wrote it during 9th grade (ganun??? ang sabihin mo 1st yr HS, feeling merong 9th grade sa philippines) but i watched that movie during middle school (anung middle school?, gagang to sobrang magfeeling) there is no doubt that this is one of my favorite songs but to give it a twist, here's the reprise of this song.

This basically encapsulates my willingnes to leave my world to be part of rossi's world and since im on disney, i decided to throw in pocahontas' color of the wind but i dont think we have such a huge cultural differences aside from my skin color and accent. So it's all good.

This is a song not included on the movie but it can be found on the 10th yr anniversary dvd of pocahontas. This song exactly expresses how i think i have found a safe home to be who i am.

Now this is the finale from that movie. One of the best endings that i can think of, it's kinda sad since they have to part but it sends hope that they will eventually be together. This also captures where i am right now, as Pocahontas run after john smith, it hit me. I am also running towards him. I know there is so much distance and time between us but i know i can whisper to the wind and it will take me where he is.

Or open up my computer and he's there!

Thanks to all the wonderful nerds who made it possible for someone like me to get to see and hear my baby!

If only you can see into my eyes, You'd find yourself in it. Just like if you look in my heart.

The stars are shining bright
like diamonds in my heart

as i lie here in your arms

tranquil with the beats of your love.

Feeling safe and satisfied.

they say forever is a long time.

takes a while to transpire

but this is the moment that lasts.

Your love is the gift,

my love is your life.

hold me close as i kiss you.

say forever i love you

The stars are shining bright.
as i close my eyes and say goodnight.

Tomorrow, i will wait untill you come back.
so we can share the stars at night.

I have been told that my life's journey would focus mainly on one thing, and that is to find myself the kind of relationship that everyone desires. I dont need fame, prestige and not even wealth, I just need someone to be there for me. A piece of this, is what i long for.

I can consider myself in a pseudo-relationship. We do not consider us a couple but we talk about the future as a possibilty of being together. It's hard coz im the least patient person in the world and for me to wait and suppress my emotions makes me the most unreasonable person to deal with.

Most of the time i feel gloomy and doubtful about the whole situation mainly because im putting myself on risk. I consider this man to be the one i wanna be with for the rest of mylife and that scares the shit out of me. Losing him will surely make me see life in a less colorfull way. I have been told to take it easy and just enjoy it but i cannot take it easy, I feel as if i dont have enought time left to spend with him. I wanna be with him forever but i know that is not possible so the least i can do is be with him now and share my life with him as soon as possible.

If we were together. I promise to make the most of our time together cause i consider now untill the day i die a short short time to be with him.

"I choose to love you and i am committed to prove that! even if i have to spend a lifetime proving it"

NICOLE~

We are such a family of celebrities. (huh?) And adding to the long line of that family pedigree are my niece and nephew. FIONA

and lance

Who has a new Tv advertisement. go and watch!

HAAAAY~ i remember my days of unending photo shoot, press conference, movie premieres and guestings! well those were the days! but im happy to get away from the limelight! i had enough of that to last a lifetime ( ? ) so i'll let the new generation have thier share!

This shows the Peter Pan movie with kissing you song from des'ree.

I dont usually find boys to be attractive but Jeremy Sumpter is so cute. I wonder how he would look like if he got older? hehehe. anyway i really like this movie (makes me wanna fall in love and cuddle with someone) and MY GAWD! this song, I like beyonce' but this shouldn't be covered by anyone else. (so just you know, beyonce did a remake of this song. check it out >>> Beyonce's kissing you. Hot video by the way, makes me wanna go to the beach and have a similar photoshoot.)

MY dad drives me to work everyday but this is the first time that i see this. (i mean after so many years of clean air)

I cant believe that this is happening again. These old inefficient vehicles are slowly staging a comeback. I know owners of these vehicles are very much aware of their problem but chooses to ignore it, excusing themselves because of poverty and expensive repairs.

Hello, We have a law called CLEAN AIR ACT and it is the responsibility of everyone to make sure that our air is free from pullutants. Back then, air emission testings are done almost everyday but now it seems that it is another classic case of  the FILIPINO NINGAS KUGON attitude.

I work in one of the tallest buildings in makati and everyday i see the whole metropolis clouded in smoke.

and everyday i go home fearing that this is what i would see in the streets

C'mon i had that growing up and i dont wanna have that again. We have made a lot of difference since the law was inacted, we just need to follow through. Dont let us go back to the dark ages. Dark black cloud of smoke is so not glamorous.

I have the right for clean and pollution free air. So dont you dare make my air dirty

Everyone knows i consider Mariah Carey as a goddess.

 And since i am CLIOGODDESS, WHY NOT?

ADVISORY! NOT FOR THE FAINT HEART

MY futile and disgusting attempt to look like this! CLICK CLICK CLICK<<<

If you havent seen the movie "RENT" you've just missed a huge chunk of your life. Here's SEASONS OF LOVE"

This song is my favorite. "LIGHT MY CANDLE" very sexy

Here's the most romantic song in the movie "I'LL COVER YOU"

And for my sisters. "TAKE ME OR LEAVE ME"

There are so many more great songs in the movie but this is the most touching and downright moving song in the entire movie. Makes me cry everytime~

For those who have seen the movie. (and for those who has not) I leave you with "NO DAY BUT TODAY"

I feel like i havent had rest in months now. Im so tired physically and emotionally although mostly i think its physical rather than emotional, or is it the other way around? im too disoriented to even figure it out.

I know i havent started my grueling training for my certificate and yet im here whining how tired i am.

I know this new journey is not an easy one but i'm hoping this wil lead me into something great in the future.

BUt as of the moment im feeling so tired, sleepy and wasted.

and not to mention grumpy.

I miss my NAPPYNAPNAP. Eversince i met my nappy almost two years ago, i have always felt that he is the better half of me. We even considered living together coz we mesh so well. Nappy and i are the types who doesnt talk much about our personal lives but when we're together, we seem to understand each other so well that our fears, insecurities, hopes and plans for the future seemed like a casual talk.

Though lately we havent spent much time since he had to go back to college to take a new course and eventually follow a new career path. I like my nappy so much coz even with his buzy schedule, He made it a point for us to meet every saturday to unwine, relax and basically take a breather from our busy lives. Last night we watched fanastic 4 (cant help it but i am so smitten with chris evans) dined in a thai restaurant, walked three blocks coz we had so much fun talking. (He's high maintenance and for him to walk that far is agonizing on his part) Had midnight snack at wendy's and parted at around 12 am. My nappy is such a great person and i simple love him. 

NAP, when our plans fall into place. remember you promised to take care of me and support me and im gonna take your word for it, hahaha. Even if i have to fly from CA to NY and back, im gonna do that so you can fulfill your promise to me, hahaha.

All my life anxiety, fear and depression had taken over my life. Selfdoubt and insecurity has held me for the longest time.

BUt no more~I've had it with this craziness. It has restricted me from enjoying my gifts.

I know i am blessed. I have potential and i am powerful but these irrational feelings has kept me from becoming the best of me. It has kept me from being happy. Now i see how i look like. a helpless, needy and weak person.

But no more! I wont allow these to control my life! no more of these crap! no more of these stupidy!

I can be who i wanna be, I am me. DEVINE, POWERFUL AND MAGNIFICENT! THE REAL ME

MY bestfriend and i haven't seen one another for ages so when she texted me to join her for dinner, I glady accepted. We went to aristocrat and ordered a hefty meal. Ok it was a binge overload i know but whatteheck, if im fat im fat.

After eating and flirting with our waiter (he flirted with me first, ok) We went ot gilligans for some fruity treat.

It was a boring night mostly coz the choice of songs played. Our waiters was the only thing entertaining us.

Piñacolada,  tequila sunrise and margarita to wrap the evening up.

this is what i havent gotten used too, people asking me for my name or even my number. sorry guys but i dont give out my number even my name. I dunno why but i just dont.

Ignore me untill i wither and die?

Well it's actually ok, since i still have this guy begging me to go out with him

And this guy constantly calling me, sometimes he gets mad at me coz i dont return any of his calls

He said he's just worried whenever i dont return his calls.

But i know i should be honest with these guys, I should tell him that i only have eyes for this guy.

Ok ryan please dont get suspicious about him.

And Chris, i hope you understand, Your'e not the chris i always talk about, pls dont give me that sad look.

HAHAHA, as if i know how but still i went there just for the fun of being present. We took a bus, crossed a street and entered a hot biliard place. I mean literally hot since they dont turn on airconditioning untill 6PM. That made me sweat and made my clogged nose worst and to add strain to my already swollen throat, Ivyness insisted that we order cold beer.

 

 We only had two but that's enough to make me a camwhore. made them uneasy as i took my pics every other 10 seconds. hahah

 I only had salad for lunch (9AM LUNCH TIME, GUDLUCK) Ivy had bread. We wanted to eat but they said kitchen is not open yet. so i was grumpy majority of my time there.

Good thing i have my camera phone with me always. makes me happy to take pics of me (ok. by now you might think im kinda obsessed about me, Go figure)

Ok, food took years to be served. it was kinda ok but ivy and i think it's kinda overpriced for a simple meal. Admittingly two beers, no food for hours and lack of sleep made me feel tipsy

 Anyway it was fun. at least i get to go out. Thanks ivyness for driving me home, well actually it was his delicious husband who was driving.

The HEll YOU CARE is trully an amazing read. 

NEED I SAY MORE?

my previous post >>> UPSTAGE ME about this remarkable blog.

Here is the evidence to give justice << click away and be amazed

Yeah, I know i like my legs, I hope my would be boyfriend would like it too

the not so wholesome version of this picture is set on private and only one man has seen it.

I am from 6Th district MANILA. and i am ashamed that my congressional representative is an assh@le.

Rep. Bienvenido Abante is under the HUMAN RIGHTS HALL OF SHAME.

Too bad i wasnt able to vote last election!

ANd to think he is a chairperson of the House Commitee on Civil, Political and Human Rights.

PWu, PWu , PWU.

 You have no rights to represent me.

Last week chris asked me if i can have my birth certificate amended. As far as i know, There was a news about that in TV patrol regarding a court hearing in pasig allowing someone to have her birth certificate changed.

Just to be sure. i asked my wonderful ANG LADLAD family. posted that query and waited for results.

DEE from STRAP (another fabulous group, no website yet) was the first one to email me about this.

Bemz Benedito was the second one.

Al Rivera was the third, and he has a different answer.

and then i received an email from F.D. Nicolas B. Pichay

basically offering his legal expertise about this matter.

Im elated about the support.

By the way, I checked about these guys, so far what i gathered are mostly about NICK PICHAY.

Nick is a lawyer and 1993 PALANCA AWARDEE, "Ang Lunes na Mahirap Bunuin";

AGAIN. I'd like to give my warmest gratitude for your help and support GUYS~

35 Flights of stairs times 4, 5 building blocks and back. No, This is not my training routine. This was the ordeal that i went through because of my training for a new skill for work. I walked from our office building to the main building just to be told that the training was held at our building, Ok my fault i didnt check the details.

Because of that, mommy allaine and i decided to have ourselves some booze after work, We invited so many people but we ended up just the two of us. anyway it was so fun, aside from the cynical, biased and negative opinion of mommy allaine about my caucasian friend, (needless to say she's still hurting from a previous relationship, makes her grumpy and doubtful about men) but i still love her, she made me grounded about my amore'. made me see things more clearly but hell, im still enjoying and whatever would come out of this, i just have to live with that. hopefully something nice! 

Alcohol started to make us feel mighty fine, We did talked about a lot mostly about other people (hahaha)   

We had 2 buckets of beer, That's 12 bottles. and if you have that many beer you start to feel really good, really good that we decided to go home, take a bath, and be fabulous for the night,

we still had 3 bottles left so i had to chug them all up. bad idea or else you'll end up looking like this.

Wasted and drunk and plain ugly`

After an hour mommy allaine was waiting for me (ok i was late an hour, sorry) i was late but i was looking oh so fabuloso' my mom thinks im wearing a "HO's costume but i think it was ok.    

Im now officially working at MACEY's, hahaha as a manequin.

NO? not accepted?? ok A CLOWN would be more suitable~ hahaha

For more pics>>> click away

Dont you just wanna be with me and

    take advantage of meMR. R?

Were talking again, its not as intense and substancial as before but at least i get to talk to him. I know this might be my nuts self talking but i kindda sense that he has grown cold towards me, cant blame him though if every single minute in our conversation i would let my insecurity get a hold of our conversation.My emotions was raging while we talk but i managed to control myself, and then boom, every cell in my crazy mind whispered that his fondness on me has waned. i try not to think that way but i cant help it.

i usually dont entertain other men but this time i needed a diversion to take my mind of my craziness. so i tried talking with other men and just like what my baby told me, its hard to compare coz my baby is simple incomparable.

i am usually guarded when it comes to men trying to hook up with me, coz their friendliness is usually libido driven. but this time it's different. He has this way of talking to me that makes me feel so comfortable about the whole sex thing and unlike with others that i cringe when it comes to sex talks, with him i usually initiate it.

I must admit i have been very volatile and emotional towards you lately. I know i can never force you into doing things that you think is too early to even imagine but my acts has been fueled by my desire to make you happy and be with you. i thought your hapiness lies with me. now i realized that what lies with me is my happiness. and my happiness alone.

NICOLE "the biggest drama queen" 

hahaha try ko lang kayo nman~

I have been so unstable this week so i needed to have a break. break from my youtube craze and rossi obsession..

Jan and i decided to meet up last night to play billiards. We were supposed to meet up but because of traffic and the crazy red car (broke down 20 times and its not because of fuel, right ivy?) i was forced to walk the whole stretch of J.P RIZAL AVE. (should've kept my butt home)

I only played pool twice during highschool, I classmate introduced me to it, at first he would allow me to shoot 3 balls and then i'll end up sitting until he finish the game (bastard)

Im just actually pretending to play here. hehehe.

what i did the whole night was to take pictures and have myself a booze.(and pretend to have fun)

This is IVY from my KAARTEHAN circle of friends

rejoice Ivy is drinking!!!  guard!!! Jufran!??

Prettyness~

My married guy friends

Ok, fidel is protesting, He's single!

Julius, is that pleasure or disgust??

Bobby? does your hand hurt from the basketbal game? im sure it does

This is EA, the most respectful guy i met.

my mysterious guy with the cap, Don,

Dont look too much @ DON, you might see his brains.

 Jan decided to drive me home (thank you so much) and i must say that was the most fun i had during the entire night.

Im so plastered but i still have to be pretty for my last picture. Thanks guys for diverting my mind off someone. I needed that break!

Yes Guys, Sad to say but my fairytale didnt last long. I am completely the one to blame. My cynical needy self got the best of me and drove this wonderful guy away from me.

I wanted to beg, i wanted to explain! but i figured that would make me look more insane than what he already thinks of me.

I realized now how unstable i am in his eyes,

How helpless i looked.

Truth of the matter is, i really did fell in love with him. i just didnt know how to handle my emotions.

 and the funny thing is, i completely understand how he feels.

It was the best feeling while it lasted but now i know this is ending.

 This is so heart breaking but somehow i kinda saw this happening.

i was ruining my happiness even from the start.

I truly and honestly love him but i guess i dont know how to show that.

This is over. Im done.

I never pray but this time i will consider.

I pray for him, i pray that he would return to me. I pray for his happiness but if his happiness doesnt lie in me. i pray that i survive this. but if my wish would be granted i simply want him back. i wish he finds his way back, i wish he finds a reason to comeback.

 ~o0o~~o0o0o~~~o0o0o0o~~~o0o0o~~o0o~

with all these drama going on. Amir was the one who brought me back to sanity. he offered his wisdom and friendly opinion (its friendly coz it harsh but that's exactly what i needed to hear to pop my princess fantasy) Now i think i will just mellow down a bit and charge it to experience! promise not to be an insecure brat ever again!

Tnx Amir